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Last Band rehearsal.

wow. i've never been so angry since a long time. i'm so angry till i shiver. i can't stand this. but i can't help myself. i'm so fucking pissed. just pissed. at every single mistake. every single thing that they can't do it up to my expectations. it's not that difficult though. all you got to do is have self-discipline. you just got to control yourself. does it mean that i'm too kind if i didn't punish you guys and could just step all over my head? or am i being too fierce and unreasonable if i punish all the time without reason? i have no other methods of disciplining you guys. all i could ever do now is get you guys to buck up in order for all the hardwork put in this project to be a success. i want all of this to work. i want all of us to be a success. i'm sick and tired of hearing all the complaints from other people looking down on us as if we're trash.

well, i'm sorry for those who i've treated badly for today. i guess the devil has taken over me. but seriously, i think it was worth. although they weren't really scolded, i still can see some were better. but some were just damn stuck up. i don't understand why. either they're lazy, or has attitude problem, or just want to show us that they're better than us, or they can't bear to see our face. i mean if you got a problem, there's no harm done by honestly saying it out, rather than gossip and talk about it behind the person's back. yes, we all make mistakes. if you're really that perfect, and no one else can do better than you, might as well you stay at home and do nothing rather than annoy everyone around you.

this world is weird. it's living hell.

i wish someone could buy me a Kinder Joy right now. i need to get rid of this devil.

well, shit happens and life has to go on.

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