all in the life, me

when you feel like the whole world is against you and you have nobody to turn to all you can do is keep quiet and live like there's nothing bothering you because tough times don't last tough people do

Well, yesterday was awesome. It was legendary. And honestly, very memorable. Though it's still fresh in my mind, but i have no doubt that it will stay in my mind for the next century and more. What happened was a unique experience which i have never been through in my entire life. Yesterday marks the first. I was invited (or self-invite rather :P) to her place for a gathering to celebrate her parents' anniversary. Being at her place was not a problem because it wasn't my first, nor meeting her big family because i had dinner with them before. But it's quite a tough thing to combine both at once; meet the family at her place. Quite a scary thing i must say. As normal people, we would feel nervous meeting people for the first time. And so i did. I was so nervous and scared of how to carry myself in front of my future family members. I was scared of what to do, what to say, how to say, how to sit, where to sit, where to stand, how to eat. Everything. I was scared. I s...

It's been ages since this blog had a new post. Time to dust it off. Since the start of 2014, all that was on my mind was A level results. I enlisted in February but the results were in March. So i served my 9 weeks in BMT and collected my results while serving. It was quite a beautiful start to my 2014 because everything was just plain and smooth because school's out of the way. Then came the enlistment part where i had to part with my other half for 2 weeks at first, then 5 days every other week. To me, it was quite a breeze knowing that every night, i hear her voice i can sleep peacefully. There were ups and downs no doubt because of a little mistrust and misunderstanding that was surfaced. But we managed to get out of that tangle fine. 9 weeks just swooped past and all i know is i've graduated from BMT with all my section mates and platoon mates. But then the crucial A level results come into play. See, i didn't do that well for my As it probably couldn't ge...

"The best thing you can do is to find someone who loves you for exactly who you are. Good mood, bad mood, ugly, pretty, handsome what have you. The right person is still gonna think the sun shines out of your ass." Well, i guess i have found the right one then. But i screwed up. Always. Just a moment ago i made a grave mistake that made her so upset i almost killed myself. What could be worse than making your significant other upset and you know you're the cause of it? I knew there was almost nothing that could be done to make her better. It was that one foolish move that i made which i utterly regret now. I honestly don't even know why i did that. I guess form now on i have to be extra careful with my words and actions since i'm no longer living my life alone. The fact that she decided to stay in my life despite the gazillion times i've hurt her actually means a whole lot to me. Yet i repeat my mistakes over. Okay, no more nonsense Yazid. It's all ser...

I really have nothing much to say about all my papers during the course of the week since last Monday but to say that I am quite confident in scoring for Geography - and that's only my H1 subject. I don't know how I might fair about all my three H2 especially Economics. I haven't been focused enough and it's about time I change that. I just hope the few weeks I have can help me improve at least to have sufficient ranking points for me to get into a university. I just want to get it over and done with but I want to do it once and do it well. Distractions aside, just mugging from now onward until the end of my last paper in November. On a side note, I just want to apologize to my beloved baby girl who is probably reading this but I just want to say sorry for not being there to accompany you today. I know you probably think soccer is much more important but I hope you understand that you are wrong. If I were to lose my life, I would rather lose it in your arms than a ...

I once told myself that i've had enough of suffering and just wanted to be with myself alone. I planned to be with someone only in the distant future after serving the nation or so but apparently the answer came much earlier. Since entering tertiary education i never thought it would actually change my life. My decision to step into a college was based on some very loose reasons but it was one decision that i did not regret. The experiences since the beginning was enjoyable; i met new people, friends, teachers, acquaintances, enemies and basically new everything. Indeed, i was actually afraid of the big A but i thought it was a long time to come at the start. After sitting through two major exams in the first year, i managed to clinch my spot for the big A the following year, and that is where i met my destiny. She arrived late last year, before the last major exam during Syawal. Ever since then, she has been a major influence on my life. What ever i do revolved around her, and i k...

Hello cold world. It's been a very hectic and very interesting week. And i am so glad it ended with a blast. I don't know why but it wasn't usually like this. So far, this is the most intense and draggy week due to the lessons that was just draggy. Consultations after consultations were also beginning to feel like a chore. But i had many opportunities to relief myself by the short street sessions. It was just heaven. I really miss soccer. And i shall miss it until after As, if God is willing. And since the start of Syawal, many things haven't been fine. Maybe it's just Allah's way of showing things but i accept and adapt. It was such a blissful thing to experience Syawal again (and Ramadhan) for it means that i get to meet my friends and seek their forgiveness, particularly a very special person. Apart from my family, she is the one who has been beside me throughout ever since the beginning of 2013. I am so grateful to her for being my pillar of strengt...